I have been hearing people talk about this a lot, this idea that God wants you to focus on Him, so don't worry about relationships or getting married, just wait on God's time. I wanted to talk about this because I think this mindset is incorrect, even though it sounds good on the surface.
The first point I would like to make is the simple fact of how God designed us. We learn in Genesis that Adam was not really complete until Eve was made to be with him.
And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. -Genesis 2:18
God designed us to get married. It is better when we have a spouse to support us and do everything with. I know people think this adds limitations to your life and that a spouse takes away attention from God, but that is just not the case, it simply means we will do everything together. It is also worth mentioning that God wants us to love other people, so in a way this is actually putting God first by following that command.
The second point that needs to be made is that just because God doesn't want us worrying about tomorrow, doesn't mean He wants us to sit on our hands and wait for Him to hand us everything. I am not saying to just go out and date a bunch of people. You should still be wise about who you choose to be with and it should always be with the intent to marry, but as things are, people are just rejecting everyone and using God as an excuse to do so. I do not believe God wants that. Quite the opposite, in fact, He wants you to get married because, as previously said, you were designed to be.
The third and most important point I would like to make is that this is a very dangerous type of legalism. It allows people to feel holier while simultaneously ignoring God's will for them, much in the same way the Pharisees did in Jesus's time.
This hasn't been made into a law at churches, but people are made to feel guilty for wanting to get married, as if in doing so they are completely ignoring God. The people causing this guilt get to walk away feeling good about themselves because they are supposedly putting God first by remaining single and pushing others to do the same. I ask you though, if an intent to marry is really such a distraction for people, why then, is it a requirement for pastors to have a wife? The people that have quite literally dedicated their lives to God and teaching His word, shepherding His people, have to get married. Yet, with this mindset that singleness is better for serving God, they should all stay single.
We all need to be very careful when we start pushing this type of thing. We are stressing people out, making them feel like they aren't good enough for wanting something God designed for them. They are being told that, because of that desire, they aren't putting God first. It just isn't true and we should never be putting guilt on a person for doing exactly what God wants for them. This also puts men, who should be the ones initiating a relationship, in a position where they may blame God for not bringing them "The One" when they never acted on the opportunity. This is all very similar to the prosperity gospel and how disappointed people will be when God doesn't make them rich and so on for their works, this mindset creates the same kind of stress. Yes, there are people out there that God has called to be single, but I assure you, they are a minority and they aren't very likely to be interested in marriage to begin with.
Just because something sounds like it is better and more holy doesn't mean it is, so next time someone is expressing interest in getting married one day, support them. Give them advice and help them to be wise about it. Encourage them to date someone who is equally yoked and who also wants to put God first in everything they do. Steer them in the right direction and help them avoid any sins they may become vulnerable to when they start a relationship, but don't make them feel guilty and tell them some nonsense about being called to singleness. God is the one who will call them to singleness, so you don't need to suggest that to them.
I wanted to talk about this movie while it was still fresh in my mind. I am glad that such a movie was made, because the evil of abortion needs to be talked about, but there are some problems with this film as well, so I am going to talk about it all. There will be spoilers.
The movie starts out with the hardest parts to watch; an abortion taking place and then a 2nd abortion taking place in a different way. I thought this was a good thing so that anyone that doesn't stay for the whole movie will still understand exactly what abortion really is with those visuals. The sad thing is that this movie is based off a true story so while what is being shown in the movie is fake, 2 babies did genuinely die. The rest of the movie shows her starting to work for Planned Parenthood to the point of becoming a clinic director while fighting with her family on if what she is doing is moral. Her friends at the clinic all encourage her in what she is doing, though, including her boss who clearly represents everything Planned Parenthood stands for.
Among other things, it shows the protesters at the gates being harassed with the sprinklers being turned on and the cops being called on them for no reason other than to get rid of them. It shows Planned Parenthood's true agenda to murder as many babies as is possible with money as the reason. Something that wasn't shown to my memory was the fact that they also want to control the population growth with abortion, but regardless, the movie does a good job of showing that they have zero good intentions. They show that the company lies in every way possible, and takes advantage of girls in a vulnerable state to convince them to murder their children. It also shows that abortion is not safe at all, regardless of what stage, and can cause massive health issues to the woman receiving it.
In almost every way this movie is good, it will serve to teach people exactly what it's intending to, that abortion is evil. On other things though the movie falls on its face, and I wanted to talk about those things now. There is a scene in the movie where they have a hurricane coming and they need to get a lot of appoints in asap. For whatever reason some genius decided to play a Christian song about God overcoming things for us, as they rushed and succeeded in murdering 20 children before a hurricane. It was very poorly chosen music which, if taken out of context, that one scene actually would make me think that the movie was FOR abortion, not against it. Another thing is that, while I have people say the movie doesn't have profanity, it has plenty of it. The H.D.P and A word are all used in this film. I am sure this is news to some people but these are all curses, which have no place in any Christian film considering we aren't ever supposed to curse. One of my biggest complaints though actually goes to the scene where the husband is trying to make her feel better by bringing her to a Mexican restaurant. They discuss movies to watch and land on the movie 300 as something that is acceptable for them both to watch. I have some news though, NO ONE should ever watch that movie, it has at least one graphic sex scene, and tons of nudity. This is not something anyone should touch, let alone a Christian, and yet the husband who is portrayed to be a fantastic Christian husband has no issue with it. This isn't okay and should not be treated as such. If you are someone watching movies like this, I suggest throwing them in the trash immediately because it's where they belong.
Another thing that I think needs to be said here is that the Christians in film are all these hyper nice types of people, along with one idiot who is just being pointlessly cruel towards the beginning. This is not how it is nor how it should be. You don't walk up to someone who is helping to murder babies daily and smile at them and say hi like you're best friends. They need the truth, not to feel welcome and happy in what they are doing, and the family should have been drastically different as well, not just grudgingly dealing with things until God sorted it out. Most times God's intent to sort it out is to have us do it, not just sit there on our hands, waiting for him to handle it. We are his instruments and if you need proof just look at the fact he wants us to preach the Gospel. Realistically, he doesn't need us for it, he could handle everything but that isn't what he chooses to do. So please don't learn from how the Christians in this movie act. The Christians in this movie are always saying that they are babies "to them" as compared to they are babies. Sometimes what they are doing is actually awesome, but most of the time they are just smiling at murderers, acting like they are buddies, which is not how Jesus was. Being a good Christian has nothing to do with making people feel comfortable but has everything to do with telling them the truth in love. I am not saying be ridiculously harsh, or that being nice is a horrid thing, but context matters in everything including this. When talking to someone thinking of getting an abortion, be nice, that is the correct way, but when talking to someone performing or aiding in doing abortions, confront them with what they are doing every chance that you get. Would the woman this movie is based off of still have been in there if one of the people at the fence had simply shown her an ultrasound? I doubt it.
Now I know people are going to say. Hey Aitheros this is a movie about abortion, shouldn't we just be focusing on the main issue instead of nit picking the “smaller stuff”? My simple answer to that is no. While abortion is horrible, that does not mean the other things cease to matter. We need to do all we can to be perfect in everything which means following Jesus's example in everything. I am not saying we will succeed but Jesus wouldn't let one sin slide so that he could focus on another, he cares about every single one. Any sin by itself, regardless of what level of importance we have put on it, is worthy of Hell and we can't forget that.
Dedicated to making strong disciples of Christ.