There is one thing that almost every Christian I know of is afraid to say; You aren't a Christian. I think this is something we all need to get past because it is hurting the Church big time
I know it can be a scary thing to tell someone they aren't saved, especially if they think they have been for a long time. Unfortunately, it still needs to be done, for their sake and for the sake of anyone else that might come to Christ. I genuinely believe that the majority of people that call themselves Christian today aren't real converts, and that is a truly terrifying thought. Millions of people going around saying they are Christian while living like complete sinners with no real faith in Jesus at all. They aren't saved, and no one they know is getting saved either. If anything they are turning further away from the faith because these false converts don't act any differently from them. False converts can only bring in more false converts and we need to do something about this.
As a general rule, these people are raised in the church and so they think they are fine. If not, they may have received a false or partial gospel which are honestly just as bad. Whatever the reason may be, they make up the majority of the Church as we know it. As long as we are afraid to tell these people they are in trouble they will stay that way. Now the obvious question is, Andrew, how do you know these people aren't saved? Every case is complicated, but there are two things I look for in everyone that are the main signs someone isn't actually saved. The first is more obvious, they don't actually know or understand the gospel. If someone is telling you they are earning their way to heaven through their good works or they don't actually know what Jesus did for them and who he is, odds are high they aren't saved. The second is their intentions behind everything that they do. It is one thing to still be a sinner, it is another to not care at all when you sin. We should always be striving to be better, to be closer to Jesus in anything we do. We are still going to fail at times, but we should never just be fine with it. If someone is happily living in sin, even actively searching for it, the odds are high they aren't saved. If you combine these two things then it's basically a guarantee.
Regardless of how hard it is, we need to be willing to tell these people, in love and with tact, that they aren't saved. We need to witness to them just like we would anyone else, kindly telling them the gospel. It is going to be hard. There is no one harder to reach then someone who has already convinced themselves they are fine. There is a solid chance that anything you say will fall on deaf ears, that they will just continue as they are. Another possibility is that they will straight up walk away from the church and never come back. This might seem bad but it is preferable to how things are now, better they be honest non-believers than fake Christians. Let's not forget the third and best possibility though, they come to Christ and put their full trust and faith in Jesus. They become genuine converts that will be eternally grateful that someone cared enough to tell them the truth instead of letting them stay as they are in fear.
I hope in the end we get more people to genuinely come to Christ than the other possibilities, but we need to understand that the way to heaven is narrow. Jesus told us that few would be going there and he also explained how to spot a false convert in Matthew 7. He didn't tell us these things for no reason. I am sorry to tell you but most people are going to walk away from being Christian, and in reality they weren't one of us from the start. They were just putting on a show, sometimes a convincing show as they themselves aren't even aware they're unsaved. But let's not be afraid to do what needs to be done and say what needs to be said. Because we love these people, we need to tell them the truth on where they stand so they can have every chance possible to truly put their trust in Christ.
Dedicated to making strong disciples of Christ.